Comments on: Gendertrouble, lesbians and relationships http://tarald.wordpress.com/2008/04/09/gendertrouble-lesbians-and-relationships/ poetry and transsexualism Thu, 27 Aug 2009 07:41:06 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Jacky V. http://tarald.wordpress.com/2008/04/09/gendertrouble-lesbians-and-relationships/#comment-48 Jacky V. Tue, 13 May 2008 12:22:15 +0000 http://tarald.wordpress.com/?p=45#comment-48 Wow, I keep reading these kinds of things online but my real life experience is SO different. It's the dyke community that helped me come to terms with being FTM. Many dykes around here think transboys are HOT HOT HOT, some of them bordering on being tranniechasers. Seeing how well transmen seemed to be an accepted part of the dyke (including lesbian and bi women, mostly queer-identified) landscape around here helped me realise that I could be happy in this existence, since I knew I would be accepted too. Wow, I keep reading these kinds of things online but my real life experience is SO different. It’s the dyke community that helped me come to terms with being FTM. Many dykes around here think transboys are HOT HOT HOT, some of them bordering on being tranniechasers. Seeing how well transmen seemed to be an accepted part of the dyke (including lesbian and bi women, mostly queer-identified) landscape around here helped me realise that I could be happy in this existence, since I knew I would be accepted too.

]]> By: genderoutlaw http://tarald.wordpress.com/2008/04/09/gendertrouble-lesbians-and-relationships/#comment-33 genderoutlaw Sun, 13 Apr 2008 17:14:49 +0000 http://tarald.wordpress.com/?p=45#comment-33 I have read about lesbians being unhappy about "losing some of their ranks" to the trans world and was a little perplexed by this attitude. I asked a MTF friend of mine yesterday if this also exists in the gay men's community. Her answer was a resounding "no". I'm not sure what this means, but it affirms my belief that women are complex, and this "enigmaticness" is part of what I find so attractive about them. ;) I have read about lesbians being unhappy about “losing some of their ranks” to the trans world and was a little perplexed by this attitude. I asked a MTF friend of mine yesterday if this also exists in the gay men’s community. Her answer was a resounding “no”. I’m not sure what this means, but it affirms my belief that women are complex, and this “enigmaticness” is part of what I find so attractive about them. ;)

]]> By: Rebecca http://tarald.wordpress.com/2008/04/09/gendertrouble-lesbians-and-relationships/#comment-30 Rebecca Wed, 09 Apr 2008 02:26:17 +0000 http://tarald.wordpress.com/?p=45#comment-30 I think that's really interesting, because my experience as a transwoman has been completely different. For me, it's been women that are fine with me being trans, and men who are more likely to have a problem. I've also found this to be the case in lesbian communities as well. I wonder if the difference might be associated with the whole "butch flight" panic. <i>You don’t find yourself a boyfriend, and then insist on seing him as a woman. That’s not how the world works, sorry girls. It is of course a bit complicated if you’re already in a relationship, but as Ryan writes ” No one should ever control someone elses coming out process”.</i> Amen to that. I think that’s really interesting, because my experience as a transwoman has been completely different. For me, it’s been women that are fine with me being trans, and men who are more likely to have a problem. I’ve also found this to be the case in lesbian communities as well. I wonder if the difference might be associated with the whole “butch flight” panic.

You don’t find yourself a boyfriend, and then insist on seing him as a woman. That’s not how the world works, sorry girls. It is of course a bit complicated if you’re already in a relationship, but as Ryan writes ” No one should ever control someone elses coming out process”.

Amen to that.

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